Countless people say that being new parents is wonderful. But behind all the happiness and excitement for having a newborn in the family, you realize that you just need help to maintain your sanity. If you belong to this group, you need to hear some advice for new parents.
Are you already flooded with advice but none of them seems relatable? No worries! Some experts have shared their insight and advice to help you tackle this new job. You’ll find the following advice come in handy to help you thrive and grow.
- 1 Advice for New Parents
- 1.1 1. Trust Yourself
- 1.2 2. Be Kind to Yourself
- 1.3 3. Be Yourself
- 1.4 4. You Can Cry If You Want
- 1.5 5. Recharge Your Energy
- 1.6 6. Boost Your Mood with Me-Time
- 1.7 7. Accept Helps from Relatives
- 1.8 8. Remember to Laugh
- 1.9 9. Share Burden with Your Partner
- 1.10 10. Be Flexible
- 1.11 11. Make Priority
- 1.12 12. Live Every Moment
- 1.13 13. Be flexible as you are likely to be a new parent.
- 1.14 14. Sleep When Baby Sleeps
- 1.15 15. Do not compare your baby
- 2 Things New Parents Don’t Want to Hear
- 2.1 “It’s Okay, You’ll Lose Weight Soon.”
- 2.2 “You Look Exhausted.”
- 2.3 “Do You Think It’s Bad? Just Wait.”
- 2.4 “That Affection Is Going to Make Your Baby Spoiled.”
- 2.5 “Stay-at-Home Moms Are the Best.”
- 2.6 “Put Your Best Effort to Breastfeed the Baby.”
- 2.7 “Other Babies Were Already Doing That at His Age.”
- 2.8 “Baby Fancy Stuff Is a Waste of Money”
- 2.9 Anything Starts with ‘You should….’
Advice for New Parents
New moms and dads may be overwhelmed with the hustle and bustle of taking care of a newborn—sleep deprivation, exhaustion, new responsibilities, and many more.
But this moment is too precious to be easily offended or upset with a few wrong words. Keep your chin up and read the following advice and some words of advice for new parents from parentinglogy for new parents to help you enjoy the new job.
1. Trust Yourself
Can I be a good parent for the baby? What if I make a mistake? These are some common questions that often come to new parents’ heads.
Read Also: Preparing for Fatherhood
You know what? No one starts off being excellent. All you have to do is trust yourself and believe that you can easily handle it. For now, remember that your newborn only needs basic things: milk and patience.
2. Be Kind to Yourself
This advice for new parents is worth the thought. Pushing yourself too hard just makes you feel worse. Be supportive of yourself as you will do to your best friend.
Don’t think about morning chores or checklist, just live in the now—do it only if you have time but don’t push yourself to accomplish all of it. Enjoy your precious moment with the little one because it won’t happen for the second time.
3. Be Yourself
Some new moms can do their job excellently and you start comparing yourself to them. Being new parents isn’t about showing off your child-care skills to other people.
It’s more about how you can be a good parent for your child, one who can understand what they need. Every parent has a different style so you can stop comparing yourself to others and figure out your own way to take care of the baby.
Next, every family has its own parenting style. Use your style as long as it’s good for your family and children.
4. You Can Cry If You Want
There are times when you can’t do anything but cry. When this happens, don’t hesitate to cry. You know what? Crying is a good way to express your emotion.
It can relieve your pain and lower your stress level, helping you to feel better afterward. But always remember not to cry before your baby because she can feel your emotion.
5. Recharge Your Energy
The next advice for new parents, make time for bedtime. Newborns will get sleep as much as he wants and it’s your golden time to recharge energy.
Get as much sleep as possible just to make sure you’re not drowning in exhaustion. You know what? Lack of sleep can cause emotional problems like feeling lonely, feeling incompetent, and restlessness.
6. Boost Your Mood with Me-Time
What’s your favorite activity before delivery? You may skip some sessions of massage or yoga after childbirth but it’s time to reclaim your me-time.
Doing your favorite activities can be a key to boosting your parenting mood. Get a massage, watch your favorite movies, read a book or anything that makes you happy. Don’t feel guilty because you deserve it.
7. Accept Helps from Relatives
You’re not alone! Marriage doesn’t separate you from your family. Remember that you always have a mom, sisters, or aunts who will be happy to help you.
Don’t hesitate to ask for help especially when you feel like you can’t handle it anymore. If you have a loose budget, you can pay for help.
Hire a babysitter from a trusted and professional agency to help take care of your newborn.
8. Remember to Laugh
This advice for new parents is worth noting. Having a baby doesn’t mean you lose a sense of humor.
Becoming a first-time parent may overwhelming but you have to be gentle with yourself. Don’t hesitate to laugh over a joke or share a silly experience with your partner.
Laughter helps boost your mood, flex your muscle and lower your stress. Why so serious? Just laugh!
You don’t have to take responsibility for your own. Share the burden with your partner and take care of each other so you’ll feel much easier to handle the job.
Plan some fun stuff for the upcoming weekend like having dinner or taking a stroll in the park. Not only does it help lower your stress, but also it strengthens the bond between each of you.
10. Be Flexible
Planning for the future is great to keep your life organized. But this advice for new parents can change your perspective about plans.
When they aren’t going as you wish, just stay calm. You may be disappointed if your teenager with anger issue, but don’t let it break your mood. Stay flexible is the best key to maintaining your sanity and you’ll realize that your sanity is much more important than your plan.
11. Make Priority
Surely you won’t have as much time as before the delivery. When it’s impossible to handle your old and new jobs at once, it’s time to set a priority.
The baby should be your top priority before doing anything else like cleaning the kitchen or doing the dishes. Just make sure the baby’s basic needs like milk and diaper have been fulfilled before you move to daily chores.
12. Live Every Moment
As the last advice for new parents, remember that your newborn has her own precious moments that won’t come twice.
Live and enjoy every moment because you will miss her first life. Hold her close, look into her eyes and feel her heartbeat. Give your best smile and you’ll see a little angel smile back at you.
There are no happier moments in life than watching your little one grow each and every day.
13. Be flexible as you are likely to be a new parent.
In fact, you’ll find that some parents mean more to you than others but if I had my parents’ bumper sticker Id say I’ll be flexible…or die! It’s great to have ideas and suggestions but our kids are here to challenge all our prejudices.
Another quote I like is from someone in the 17th century before I had kids I came up with 6 theories about them.
I already have 6 kids no theory! Especially when things are accidentally flexible. You might be surprised how much rolling it can keep you in the mood.
14. Sleep When Baby Sleeps
Children do a lot of work when they wake up so take advantage of the opportunity to fall asleep while they sleep because they sleep when they fall asleep.
You cant sleep when they wake up. So don’t miss the chance to fall asleep while they sleep.
Waking up late after watching your favorite show can be exciting. But if you wake up late and wake up four times in a six-hour day you can be even more terrible when you try to nurse your baby during the day for insomnia.
Avoid stress and get enough sleep. The only possible way to do this is to put your baby to sleep as often as possible.
I started sleeping at 8 pm while my twins were sleeping. I know you sleep every 2-3 hours so going to bed early is a way for me to get enough sleep.
15. Do not compare your baby
All babies are not the same. Neither good nor bad. Some children suffer from constipation.
This does not mean that they will have problems later. The twins suffer from GERD and colic and are now healthy and happy at the age of six. All babies will grow up at different levels.
When one is nine months old and another is under 14 months old they are both healthy and happy.
Never compare your baby. The typical range of development is very wide. Ask your pediatrician if you have any concerns about its development.
Things New Parents Don’t Want to Hear
The birth of a baby is undoubtedly a miracle but it can be a tough job at the same time.
Unfortunately, many people don’t have good knowledge about this, so they say wrong statements that can break first-time parents’ mood and confidence.
Those people might have a good intention—give you advice—but they end up putting you down.
The so-called well-meaning statements can be harmful, especially to new parents.
When it comes together with sleep deprivation, piles of responsibilities, and many other burdens, they’re going to feel worse. This will cause the inability to cope with their new job as parents.
However, knowing the worst advice for new parents is necessary for your mental health. If you’re a new parent, you should be aware that some wicked words probably come to your ears.
These statements can cause a bad feeling, yes, but knowing it in advance helps you manage your emotion when hearing it from others. It can help you to deal with family stress.
Even if you’re not a new parent, getting to know bad advice for new parents is also necessary.
It helps you become wiser in giving advice. If you have a friend or relative who recently gave birth, you know what kind of things you can’t say to them.
So, what are the worst statements every new parent doesn’t want to hear? Here’s the list.
“It’s Okay, You’ll Lose Weight Soon.”
This statement sounds wise and supportive but it can ruin new parents’ confidence. It can be construed as negative because parents will think that their post-baby body is unideal.
Body appearance shouldn’t be up for discussion as new mothers can be vulnerable and sensitive. The fact that some people will go back to their pre-baby body and some others don’t, it’s much wiser to avoid this statement.
“You Look Exhausted.”
Yes, new parents hear this a lot from friends or relatives. They are struggling with night shifts as their newborn wakes up every couple of hours at night.
It doesn’t make parents just look exhausted, it makes them exhausted! You probably want to say sympathy but it can offend the parents. You’ll better tell a joke that can help them laugh and sway their burden for a little while.
You know what? Interrupted sleep give more negative effects on mood, so new parents can be more sensitive and vulnerable. Throwing a joke can help them boost their mood, allowing them to cope with their new job. Just ensure your jokes aren’t offensive.
“Do You Think It’s Bad? Just Wait.”
Some older people think they know anything about parenting. They start giving advice for new parents that a newborn baby is just the beginning of something worse.
This statement won’t make parents feel better, instead, it can load their minds with anxiety and fear.
“That Affection Is Going to Make Your Baby Spoiled.”
Okay, this one sounds more like a critic than a piece of advice. No matter what you call it, giving physical affection to a newborn baby isn’t a part of spoiling.
You need to build a strong bond with the baby and holding them can be one of the best ways. As long as the baby is comfortable, you can hold her as much as you want. Remember that there will be a time they don’t want to be held.
“Stay-at-Home Moms Are the Best.”
Of course, being with the kids all the time seems like a dream for some working parents. However, there’s a financial necessity that should be taken into account.
Every household has different financial capabilities and some women have to go to work to support the family finance. There’s nothing wrong with it and bringing it up for a discussion isn’t a good idea.
“Put Your Best Effort to Breastfeed the Baby.”
This is one of the worst advice for new parents. Unluckily, many people still think that saying this kind of thing makes them feel better. Breastfeeding is undeniably a time-honored practice but not all moms have the honor to breastfeed their babies.
There are too many reasons why these moms cannot nurse their baby, either physical or emotional reasons. No matter what reasons they have, they shouldn’t be shamed. So, it’s just unwise to say that breast is best.
“Other Babies Were Already Doing That at His Age.”
Comparing a baby with others is the worst mistake that commonly happens. Babies have their own time—they know when to crawl, walk, or talk. As parents, you can stimulate their development but cannot push them to do something they don’t want to.
Avoid telling new parents anything other babies were capable of. Especially for parents of babies with special needs, this discussion can be painful. You also need to avoid giving advice for new parents that sounds more like a judgment.
“Baby Fancy Stuff Is a Waste of Money”
Well, you might know that stroller or carrier is a waste of money. But it’s the last thing every new parent wants to hear from their friends or relatives.
Some parents are too excited to welcome the baby so they just can’t help to buy those fancy baby accessories. Some others buy cute stuff to change the new job into something positive and fun.
Anything Starts with ‘You should….’
Most advice for new parents that starts with ‘you should’ can give first-time parents a real headache. Some friends or relatives give ideas about how a mom should bathe, hold, or breastfeed the baby.
Unfortunately, this advice can be misguided. If you’re a new parent and hear this, you don’t necessarily need to follow everything you hear. Just listen and do what you think it’s good for the baby.
Overall, being a first-time parent can be wonderful yet challenging. Much to your surprise, people will happily give advice for new parents without being asked. As a mom or dad, it’s important to be wise in responding to the advice. Just remember that not all you hear is good. You can simply ignore unnecessary or misguiding advice and keep your good mood going.